I know… I haven’t written in a while… AGAIN…. I know.. I know. Turmoil seems to be the name of the game in my life right about now. Issues with myself, my family, my marriage, my kids… did I leave anything out? Oh yeah!!! I hate being broke as a joke!!! HAHAHA!!!

Today is the day my in-laws leave Texas. They have decided to pack up and move to Florida with my sister in law. I haven’t written about this up till now because I know that they read it. I don’t want anyone to feel like I DON’T want them to do what is best for them. And I know that I can write this and them not read it till they get to Florida. I know this move will be a good thing. They are in a position in their lives that they really need a good adventure. They have no kids at home to worry about, so why shouldn’t they up and take an adventure? I think we all wish that we could do that sometimes. Just be able to go where a whim takes us for a while and see who we truly are on the inside, wouldn’t that be wonderful?

Ok… now that I have said how wonderful it is for them… let me just say, I think that it REALLY sucks for me. I don’t have the typical “in-law” relationship with these people. There have been times over the last 10 years where they have been the only parent that I have known. They have stood beside me and helped me in any way possible. Now I don’t mean just when finances get hard… cause all parents o that from time to time for their kids. My in-laws have stood beside me and defended me to my very own family. When my mom is in one of her stupors, they have been there to help me through it. To tell me that she will get past it and everything will work out. Even when it doesn’t work out, they have been there to try and support me in the decisions that I have made. These are the same people that welcome my family into their home and are happy to talk to them and be social with them. Even after knowing what they have done to me and what has gone on, they have been there to help me make peace. At least inside myself.

Now I realize that most people don’t have a relationship with their in-laws like I do. Its more of a “we get together on holidays and birthdays and talk on the phone” type of relationship. But I have sat for hours on end with my mother in law, just playing games and cutting up. Having a good time. I go horse back ridding with my father in law. Just the two of us. Enjoying being out what we are doing. I can sit around with these people and have a beer and “shoot the shit” about anything. I truly love my in laws more than most, I have to say. Not that we don’t have our issues, but who doesn’t have issues with their parents or family? It doesn’t mean we don’t love them.

Now as you all know, I have children as well. It hurts to know that they will be so far away from their grandchildren. To also know that they are the only grandparents that my kids really have a relationship with. Now don’t misunderstand, they know all of their grandparents, But my in laws are far and beyond the most involved in their lives. Any time that my husband and I have quality time for just the 2 of us, its thanks to them. They have been there to give us a break from the kid race and to just be able to enjoy each other for a few hours or a night. I cant tell you how valuable those things are for us. Its not just anyone who can take on 5 kids all at the same time. Ages 14 months to nearly 9.

I truly respect these people for everything that they have done for me, done with me and are to me. I love them more than most people in my life right now and am heart broken on a purely selfish reason to see them go. I wish them the best of luck and send my love out to them along their journey.

Trinity, HD, Me